Wipe Wars: Back to front or front to back?

When it comes to personal grooming, we’ve all got our routines. We’ve got our shaving rituals, our beard grooming techniques, and that go-to “gonna crush this date” cologne. But there’s one routine we don’t talk about enough—the art of wiping. Strap in gents, we’re diving into the great butt-wiping debate: front to back or back to front? Hopefully you’re sitting down, let’s get to the bottom of this!

The Case for Front to Back
It seems, well, natural, like breathing or hating the Boston Celtics (wait, what?), and it probably feels like we’ve all been wiping front to back since we learned to wipe.This method is endorsed by many experts, particularly when it comes to hygiene. According to Dr. John Gilmore, a proctologist with over 20 years of experience, “Wiping from front to back is the preferred method because it reduces the risk of transferring bacteria from the anus to the urethra, which can cause infections.” Boom, SCIENCE.

So, why does front to back get the seal of approval? The logic is pretty simple—keeping the dirty stuff away from the clean stuff aka, don’t sweep dirt into the house. By wiping away from sensitive areas, you reduce the risk of bacteria and other unwanted guests finding their way where they shouldn’t be. If you’re someone who’s prone to skin irritations or infections down there, this technique might be your best bet for staying fresh and avoiding any awkward doctor visits.

The Case For Back to Front
But, (nailed it) what about the other side of the debate? Yes, there are plenty of guys out there who swear by the back to front method. It’s often touted as more natural, particularly for those who might find it physically easier to reach in that direction. Plus, let’s be honest, it can feel more thorough for some, like parallel parking on the right side of the street.

Dr. G has some thoughts though, “While back to front might feel easier or more effective for some men, it can increase the risk of irritation and infection, especially if proper hygiene isn’t followed.”

If you’re a back-to-front wiper, it doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong—but it does mean you should be extra cautious. Cleanliness is key here, and if you choose this method, it might be worth incorporating wet wipes or other cleansing products to ensure you’re staying as clean as possible. We’ve discussed before, but it bears repeating, you’re washing your butt crack aren’t you?

Behold, The Wet Wipe Solution
Regardless of what side of the road you’re driving on, some extra undercarriage maintenance from some wipes is always the right move. In fact, if you’re truly committed to that wipe life, the debate over front to back or back to front becomes a moot point and you simply graduate to a more comfortable, more thorough, and fresher-smelling clean that’s gentler on the skin than dry toilet paper.

“Wet wipes can be a game-changer for those who experience irritation or discomfort with regular toilet paper,” says Dr. Sarah Roberts, a dermatologist who specializes in sensitive skin issues. “They provide a better clean and can reduce the friction that often leads to irritation, especially if you’re wiping multiple times.”

Of course, not all wet wipes are created equal. Some are designed specifically for sensitive skin and contain ingredients that soothe rather than irritate. Look for wipes that are alcohol-free and are fortified with natural, skin-friendly ingredients like aloe vera and vitamin E.

The Verdict
So, what’s the final word on this butt-wiping battle? Ultimately, it comes down to personal preference and what works best for your body. If front to back is your jam, stick with it for its tried-and-true hygiene benefits. If back to front feels more natural, just make sure you’re staying clean and reducing any risk of irritation. And if you want to really up your game, consider adding wet wipes to your routine for a cleaner, fresher finish.

When it’s game time, it’s not just about which direction you wipe—it’s about feeling confident, clean, and comfortable, and that’s something we can all get behind (sorry, had to).